Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Here Fishy

Am I losing the mystic draw of poker? I’m not sure but I think that in some ways I am. I relate it to catching a fish. The pond of life is poker in this instance and we are just fish swimming around playing our games and having fun. Some of us grow to be big fish and grow to legendary size while others of us get big slowly and though we try to grow we only get so bog. Then there are the baby minnows and fish that have had their growth stunted. They try to get bigger but just don’t have what it takes to take the food from the big boys.

So now we have a poker ecosystem, relating to the fish pond. The muskies are on the prowl. They need food and will attack any unsuspecting fish around. The bass and walleyes are trolling about, trying to avoid the muskies and make their own little place in the pond. The rest are just trying to survive. The dodge and dip and hide in the weeds to stay alive for their chance to live in the pond of poker.

Along comes a fisherman. This fisherman can be symbolic of anything in life so you make use anything you like. He casts his bait and the meal looks inviting to some and is while others look away. The fish takes the bait and a struggle ensues. Back and forth the fish fights for its life while the fisherman slowly brings his prey to the boat. After a while the fish gets tired and is carried by the line to the boat. And as the fisherman grabs for the fish, the fish fights and gives a last effort to get lose and back to his home in the pond.

Looking at my poker life I know I am a small fish in a big pond. I swim with the sharks and have avoided death by ingestion so far. But I think that I may be on the fisherman’s line. I enjoy my life in the pond but I’m wondering what is trying to pull me away. Is this an early struggle or am I trying to keep from being brought into the boat?

The real question I must ask my self is what am I doing? Is this just a degenerate habit that eats up time? Time that I could be spending on other more useful things. Or is this something that I feel can bring me to another level of understanding. Does walking away from poker make me a quitter? I’m not the type of person who gives up on things. But maybe this wouldn’t be quitting. All things have a beginning and an end so maybe the time for poker in my life if concluding. I don’t really know.

I love the game and have seen many improvements since I started this blog last year. The real problem is that without the proper bankroll and without the staying power to build it up, I’m becoming disenchanted with the game. I’ve many nice runs in tourneys and I know that I can do it a the higher levels. But one of the rules was to stay with the original plan and keep from putting any of my own money into it. I can play this game forever and not go broke. That is a fact. There are small enough levels of play that anyone with any skill can tread water indefinitely. But that is not for me. I will give the game another 2 or 3 months before I make a decision but as of right now I am on the clock. I’m caught on a hook and trying to spit it out. We’ll see if I can.

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